Today is R U OK? Day and this year the message is: Are they really OK? Ask them today.

Do you know how the people in your world are really going? Life’s ups and downs happen to all of us, so chances are someone you know might be struggling. Your genuine support can make a difference whatever they’re facing, big or small. Don’t wait until someone’s visibly distressed or in crisis—make a moment meaningful and ask them how they’re really going.

Are they really OK? Ask them today. Your conversation could change a life.

How to ask ‘Are you OK?’ from

Before you ask:

  • Learn more about the signs and when it’s time to ask R U OK? here
  • Roleplay an R U OK? Conversation here or use the ‘RUOK Mate’ action on Google to roleplay scenarios and get tips on how, when and where to ask R U OK? Say, ‘Hey Google, talk to RUOK Mate’ to get started.

Getting ready to ask:

Before you can look out for others, you need to look out for yourself. And that’s ok. If you’re not in the right headspace or you don’t think you’re the right person to have the conversation, try to think of someone else in their support network who could talk to them.

To help you decide whether you’re ready to start a meaningful conversation, ask yourself:

  • If you’re ready—are you in a good headspace, able to give as much time as needed and willing to genuinely listen?
  • If you’re prepared—do you understand that if you ask if someone’s ok, the answer could be no? Do you understand that you can’t fix someone’s problems, and can you accept that they might not be ready or willing to talk to you?
  • If you’ve picked your moment—have you chosen somewhere relatively private and comfy, figured out a time that will be good for them to chat, and ensured you have enough time to chat with them properly?

Asking R U OK?:

By starting a conversation and commenting on the changes you’ve noticed, you could help that family member, friend or workmate open up. If they say they are not ok, you can follow the R U OK? conversation steps to show them they’re supported and help them find strategies to better manage the load. If they are ok, that person will know you’re someone who cares enough to ask. The steps are:

  1. Ask R U OK?
  2. Listen with an open mind.
  3. Encourage action.
  4. Check in.

(RUOK, 2021)

For more information about R U OK? Day and resources to help you have the conversation and make a moment meaningful, visit the R U OK? website here.